Early riser

I used to be an early riser. As a teen I would wake my dad up at 5:30 or 6 to go on a walk with me. I loved the crisp air, the light exercise, but mainly I just loved the time with my dad. I still cherish those years at home where I got to soak in all my parents wisdom- when I would listen anyways. Now, I am married to a wonderful Christian man and we have one beautiful daughter. My husband is not an early riser. So in our first year of marriage I learned to “sleep in” till seven or eight on days I didn’t work. Now, my sweet little Tessa at eighteen months old still prefers to wake up before five some days. I am exhausted. I’ve actually had to start taking some naps throughout to week for the benefit of my health. My doctor actually told me I should have some naps (along with other things) to help my dizzy spells go away. So, here I am 5:44am already been awake for almost an hour. We will soon get ready to go on our early morning walk. And although I hate getting up this early because I know it’ll mean me being tired all day- I can’t help but hope she will still want to get up early when she is a teen to go for walks with her mama and share the things of her heart with me. So here’s to counting my blessings and making the most out of an early riser.

Xoxo Readers, find the joy in every day.

2 Kings

I am currently trying to finish reading through the Bible again. I’ve been working on it for a couple years this time as I have read all the books in the New Testament numerous times. I firmly believe as a Christian we have a responsibility to read the entirety of Scripture if we have access to it. I live in a country where it is in many languages including my own, and as of right now, it is still legal to read one. I believe we should at least have a basic understanding of the whole Bible in able to properly interpret it as well as have a proper view of God. God is so many things… He is love, and mercy and grace. And He is the avenger, He passes judgment perfectly every time. He is the moral compass for life because He is the Creator. We have the choice to obey or not, but that doesn’t change the truth of what is right. I am almost half-way through 2 Kings and it is a difficult read. There is a lot of death. A lot of terribly wicked people, both men and women, who oppose God. These and men and women who by anyone’s standards would be considered wicked- so you can imagine where they stand before God. Sinners. Enemies of God, as we all stand without the grace of Christ in our lives. As I read, I remembered the verse in the New Testament in 1 Peter 3:18. Christ died once for all, the just for the unjust. Many other times it talks about this as well. Christ died so that even the vilest of offenders could have the opportunity to come to Christ. And we as Christians aren’t called to go out and kill those who are opposed to God. Jesus came into the world not to condemn the world, but to save it. We are called to be light in the darkness. To be a witness to the grace that is found in Christ Jesus! I know a time will come where judgment will be poured out on the earth as is layed out in Revelation. But praise God we aren’t there yet (I only say that because at some point it will be too late for the world to come to God). Right now we still have opportunities to love our neighbors, and our friends and our kids and show them how marvelous our God is. He is much bigger than my small mind can comprehend, although I think that’s great.

Our little homestead

We got chickens!! Eight beautiful laying hens. We now get seven or eight eggs a day and are loving every minute. Tessa, our busy toddler, loves to try and pet them and feed them. She screams with delight around them, her eyes always sparkling. She seems to have such a love for life I pray she never loses. Our garden is also taking off, we are harvesting lots of romaine and leaf lettuce and green beans! We’ve harvested kale and radishes and strawberries! Those are our favorite so far. 😁 We will soon harvest cucumber and zucchini, I’m most excited for zucchini because then I can eat “pasta” and “lasagna” again. Yum.

Anyone out there have gardens? How is yours doing? What are you harvesting right now?

I’m back!

For the few people that actually read this…. It turns out I am a terrible blogger- big shocker there! These past few months have been a bit trying for me spiritually, physically, emotionally… We are trying to get pregnant and the first two times we got pregnant right away 🤰😄 Our Angel baby lived in my womb three months before we lost him. Our daughter is now 18 months old and I’ve wanted a second baby since she was about six months, though my husband wanted to wait. So now here we are, I think this is the sixth month of trying… Still waiting. Waiting on the Lord is a funny thing. It seems pretty simple when you are waiting three weeks to take a pregnancy test, but waiting six months just to see aunt flow every month is much harder. So I’ve started focusing on other things. Like signing myself up for way too many church volunteer positions and cleaning jobs, and getting chickens and growing a bigger garden and starting T-25 so I can get fit. 😅 Let’s just say it takes a lot of prayer and distraction to keep me sane these days. On top of that I’ve been feeling pregnant the past few months, very dizzy and so stinkin tired. But yet, God is still here with me. He is still so good. So gracious towards me and patient as I learn to wait on Him. I know I need to focus more on Him and less on my present circumstances. It’s ridiculous to me that I’m having such a hard time with that right now. I got to a pretty low point mentally a couple weeks ago… Thank God He brought me out of that and into His presence. I want a better and deeper relationship with Christ. I hunger for Him.

I pray that those reading this would be reminded that despite what you may be going through, we are all on a journey that’s gunna go a whole lot smoother once we start to rest in Jesus.

You are there

I praise You for where I am today,

I never knew what life could hold.

When I let go and let You lead,

My journey became better than I could ever dream.

Through trials and heartbreaks,

You carried me.

Through triumphs and blessings,

You walked with me.

Through my hardest goodbye,

You caught every tear.

Through my happiest day,

You joined in my cheer.

As I pray for wisdom,

You direct my steps.

When I pray for understanding,

You call me to trust.

The future seems so uncertain,

But You alone are Lord over all.

PRAISE GOD

Praise God!!

How great and mighty is His salvation,

He has set me free from the bondage to sin.

No longer a slave am I,

To the weight of serving self.

God has declared me righteous,

This is all too wonderful for me!

Who am I but a sinner purchased by the blood of the Lamb.

My life has been redeemed,

Now the daughter of the King.

LORD your mercies extended to me are unfathomable.

I praise the holy One-

Oh God, there is no one like you.

You paid my debt in full,

Your only Son, perfect and holy One.

Like a flood your forgiveness engulfs me,

Like a fire you love consumes me!

You are my rescuer and deliverer.

All the day long I will praise you;

King of Kings and LORD of LORD’s.

You are my God-

The One true God.

Lord use me

Lord I feel so inadequate to be used by you,

Far too often it feels as though I have nothing to offer.

What help can I lend a mother with a troubled child?

What comfort can I give to a teen who wants to die?

What hope can I offer a discouraged sister?

When they feel like their life is all too much for them,

How can I point them to you?

I know you are the healer and redeemer.

You alone can rescue and deliver.

Open the eyes of these women I pray,

Make a way for them to see your glorious face!

Empty me of my selfishness and pride,

And fill me with your holiness and humility.

Fill me with wisdom and discretion.

Create in me a vessel to be used by you!

I am willing and you are able,

So take this life it is not my own,

All for your glory I want to be used.

31 Day Scripture Writing Plan

Day 8: 2 Corinthians 5:17-21

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation, that is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them, and has committed to us the word of reconciliation. Now then, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were pleading through us: we implore you on Christ’s behalf, be reconciled to God. For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.”

2 Corinthians 5:17-21

My Reflections

This is a wonderful and very important passage. This is the salvation message. This passage also clearly paints the responsibility we as Christians have to share the gospel. We are Christ’s ambassador’s!!! What a tremendous blessing and burden. I only say burden because we are called to spread the gospel, the hope and good news of the saving grace of our Savior, and many remain silent about it. If we truly have this transformed life, if we really are a new creation the salvation message ought to burn in our hearts with the desire to share. We are born enemies of God, so both by nature and by choice we are enemies of God. This is why we need to be reconciled to Him. We needed the price (death) to be paid, which is what the passage is talking about in verses 20-21. Christ is God, He is God’s Son, He came to earth and took on flesh being fully man and fully God- mind. blown. So when Jesus died, sinless, He took our sins on Himself: He paid our penalty. Now, because Jesus was sinless, and is God, He rose from the dead three days later! So when we believe on Him and repent from our sins, we are forgiven and made right with God. That is what the verse means when it talks about us becoming the righteousness of God- we certainly aren’t perfect, we will continue to mess up at times, but when God looks at us, He sees the perfection of His Son. Jesus blood washed us white as snow. We are now new creation’s, so our desires will become those of God. We will start to be transformed by the Holy Spirit and the renewing of our mind (done through reading the scripture, praying, attending a God-centered church).

God I pray you would teach me how to be a good ambassador. I know what I need to do- give me the strength, courage and opportunities to share Your great gospel with everyone I possibly can. I praise You for giving me this great task of spreading the news of grace to all the nations. Most importantly I praise and thank You for saving me. I am undeserving which is why it’s called grace. I love You LORD and pray I would share that with everyone I can! Amen.

31 Day Scripture Writing Plan

Day 7: Philippians 3:7-14

Sorry this is a few days late. Between my daughter being sick and having her first birthday party blogging has been pretty low on my priority list. Getting back at it now! Hope you are blessed by the Word of God.

“But what things were gain to me, these I have counted loss for Christ. Yet indeed I also count all things loss for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my LORD, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them as rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in Him, not having my own righteousness, which is from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which is from God by faith; that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death, if, by any means, I may attain to the resurrection from the dead.

Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”

Philippians 3:7-14

If that passage doesn’t challenge and encourage you to live for Christ I don’t know what will! Paul essentially “had it all” before being confronted by God on his way to Damascus. He had the power to do what he pleased, he was feared by men and respected by even the High Priest who gave him permission to arrest any followers of Christ (Acts 9). Paul accounts all these “accomplishments” as rubbish in Philippians. He gladly gave up his past life to pursue God Almighty! He was confronted by God and instead of making excuses and longing to stay the same, he eagerly began a life of obedience to the LORD. Paul is a very humble man. He is clear that he is not yet perfected, and he gives glory and honor to God for the righteousness in his life. Paul understands that the righteousness of Christ is imputed onto us at the moment of salvation, but that does not mean we are perfect. We still live in sinful human bodies, but when God looks at us, He now sees the righteousness of His Son! This ought to humble us greatly. We as Christians, need to look forward and press on for Christ. Spreading the Gospel and making disciples wherever we are and wherever God calls us to.

Father, You are holy and mighty and great and fearsome. You are Divine and our intercessor. You interceded for Saul when he was making terrible decisions, please intercede in my life when I stray from the truth. Most importantly though I pray that I would press on and not stray from You. I pray I would endure suffering and view it as sharing in the suffering of Christ. You are a good Father, and I do not regret one day that I have spent on You. Please continue to purify me and make me like You. All praise and honor and glory be to You LORD forever and ever amen.

The exhausted, grateful mom

My baby girl, Tessa, will be a year old in just three short days. It’s totally incredible how fast this year has gone by. I will never forget my excitement as that pee stick turned positive. I was filled with hopes and dreams and anticipation at all the firsts and unknowns around the corner. The exhaustion mixed with nausea seemed more than I could handle those first few months- I tip my hat to the moms who are vomiting the entire pregnancy. Not. Fun. I had watched my sister go through pregnancy so I thought I knew a bit of what to expect. But in my opinion there is only so much you can prepare for until you just dive in. My labour was long and hard and brutal to say the least. Allergic reactions to a few things including the tape they used to administer three epidurals when I wanted nothing (you see, things don’t always go the way you plan). Almost twenty four hours later with two hours of hard pushing and trying every position known to mankind to relive the pain along with TWO episiotomy’s, finally, our beautiful baby girl was laid on my chest. She picked up her head and looked at me with worry in her eyes. She had left the comfort of my womb and her life would be changed forever, so would ours. My husband and I were surrounded by loved ones and it was awesome. My husband is the most patient and kind, understanding and supportive, godly man I have ever known. He was my biggest supporter over the nine months of pregnancy and through this past year of her life outside the womb. Bringing her home for the first time, we quickly realized they told us nothing of how to care for a child while we were in the hospital. All they told us was to breast feed, only let her sleep on her back, no blankets, the list of don’ts continued. Other than that, it was pretty much good luck. I had never been so tired in my life as I was those first few days and weeks. We learned a lot about raising a baby and caring for her needs. She is a belly sleeper, and she likes having a blanket on her- go figure. I’m glad we are past the phase of laying her down as gently as possible and sneaking out of the room to catch a nap. We are done breastfeeding as it started to go down hill after we spent a week in the hospital when she got that terrible RSV when she was just under a month. Then there are those incredibly exciting memories, like when she first smiled at me, when Tim first got her to laugh, when she learned how to roll over, to crawl, to walk. Her first words; mama, Dada, her newest is “what’s that?” I have to admit I thought I had quite a while before she started asking that. She isn’t a good sleeper so she still doesn’t sleep through the night consistently. I blame my hubby for that because he’s a terrible sleeper. But seriously, when she is cutting teeth-which she has been since like four months- she wakes up four or five times in the night. Most times I go to her because I tell Tim he needs to sleep so he can go to work and actually function. (I sometiems secretly wish I could just sleep in bed all night and make him do it, ok fine maybe it’s not so secret.) Being a mom is the most exhausting work I have ever done in my life and harder than I ever imagined possible. It really is 24/7 because even when I’m away from her I am responsible for her and I constantly check up on how she’s doing when I’m gone. I make breakfast, lunch and dinner, I clean the house and do the laundry and change the diapers and do the bath time and do the 6am wake up call. But honestly, I love this. I want to do all this because I feel this is the way God designed it. I am better at this than any other job I’ve ever had. I just thought I’d be more rested after a year! What a wonderful gift to be a mom. What a wonderful gift to be exhausted all the time. I had a miscarriage with my first pregnancy and it almost broke me… I certainly have never been the same. I’m stronger now, and I have a scar. I hope I am always tired. Tired running after my daughter, cooking meals for my family, taking care of the house for my husband (he does help out all the time just so no one accuses him of being a lazy bum). I always want to be here for my family and be the one they can unload on and be silly with, and get kisses and hugs from. I love the gift of family I’ve been given. Don’t you?